Perfectionism

Perfectionism

by Tammy Pfaff
 
I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things
or that I have already reached perfection.
But I press on to possess that perfection for which
Christ Jesus first possessed me. 
Philippians 3:12 (NLT)

Perfectionism almost crippled me during a difficult time with depression. I was asked to paint a New York city skyline as a back-drop for a play. I didn’t know how to say “no” to anyone at the time. I spent hours cutting out cardboard in the shape of skyscrapers. I was over-whelmed and spent hours upon hours putting it together and painting it, making some of the windows appear lit up in a night scene. It had to be perfect, I thought. Not considering that after the play, it would be tossed in the trash.

I’ve always been a person who is tedious in nature and strives to do the best work possible, no matter what the task. I take pride in it. That is ok to a point, except when I put unnecessary time and effort into things that have to be my version of perfect. Why did I put so much pressure on myself causing a great deal of stress?

I had to begin by asking myself, why am I doing this?

• Am I looking for approval or praise?
• Am I spending too much time worrying about the project?
• Am I putting too much pressure on myself, wanting to be perfect?
• Did I commit to do something I am not equipped to do?
• Am I too proud to ask for help?
  
  

Today I will not torture myself tying to be the perfect person. I’ve since learned that yes, I’ll do the best I can but that is all. Everyone has certain talents, strengths and weaknesses. But when we struggle with self-confidence or perfectionism, we shouldn’t drive ourselves crazy by trying to be the best of the best. We give it our all with what we’ve got, nothing more, nothing less. We should feel good about it and move on. It can be easier said then done but practice makes perfect.

Here are some exercises that helped me to overcome
the negative power of perfectionism:

• Feel good about who you are. Pray to see yourself as He sees you. See Psalm 139.
• Be sure to pray and ask God if this project is something, He intended you to do? Ask, “is it in His plan for me? (See Jeremiah 29:11 below.)
• Don’t drive yourself nuts. Set a reasonable limit on the time spent on a task.
• If you need help, ask for it. But don’t let them do all the work.
• Give it your best and try to be ok with it.
• Be careful not to rely on approval or praise from others.
• Don’t over-extend yourself with projects. Learn to say, “no” or “let me think about it and I’ll get back to you.” Set boundaries and limits.
• Feel good about your accomplishments.

 
Next time you take on a project, pray,
ask God if this is in His plan for me. Ask, “Will it bring me closer to Him?”

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For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.” 
Jeremiah 29:11-13 (NLT)

If you feel it is in His plan for you, do it for the Lord:

Work willingly at whatever you do,
as though you were working for the Lord
 rather than for people.
Colossians 3:23 (NLT)

Continually seek to know Christ and you will know what He wants you to do.