Tammy Pfaff
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Facing Fear

8/29/2013

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Lately I’m not myself. Summer is ending which always brings me down. I begin my fall semester at college, full of fear that I won’t pass the algebra class. Full of fear that if the professor calls on me, I won’t know the answer. I’m a forty-nine-year-old student and a mother of four children who range in ages ten to twenty-three. Helping my two younger children with homework will also begin next week. Let’s not forget I’ll need to get them to their outside of school activities. I’m in what I call a funk. This means I’m quiet, going through the motions topped off with a little anxiety and negative thinking.

There are several things I can do to alleviate these symptoms. But the most valuable remedy I find is turning it over to God—constantly. I have to remember that even if I can’t, He can. That kind of faith has been built in me by doing things I wasn’t capable of doing through trusting in His strength and answered prayers. He has seen me through much bigger things than a math class. Yet the fear, the negative thinking still creeps in. I constantly have to remind myself that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13).

Sometimes I have fear of the unknown. What will the class be like? What will the professor expect of me? Do the other students struggle with algebra as much as I do? Will I find a tutor that is helpful? Once I get through the first day of school, things will subside. Until then I must occupy myself with other things to keep my mind off these questions. But what is helpful is identifying what my underlying fear is. For me it is the fear of failing. But the bottom line is that no matter what happens, I have a Father that will still love me no matter what. Nothing can ever separate us from the love of God (Romans 8:38-39). It’s okay if I make a mistake because nothing will ever separate me from the love of God.

I’m guilty of projecting the outcome with negative thoughts. I still have a little trouble with breaking this habit. I have to remember that God created me with every plan in mind. I am unique. He wouldn’t bring me this far to fail if I’m trusting in Him. If I do fail the math, maybe it’s not the degree He wanted me to have. If I continue to seek his presence and guidance in every decision that I make, I will be following His plan.

Stinkin’ thinkin’ can cause worry and anxiety. I have to stay in today and cast my worries on God. I must focus my thoughts on positive things and occupy my time with positive action.  My today list helps me to stay organized. Of course if an unexpected wrench is thrown into my plans, I have to adjust. I must do my part by setting aside time to do homework and meet with a tutor. I can’t just sit back hoping God will do it all. But I can put God in the driver’s seat to steer my course. I’m determined to keep my GPA with hard work and dedication.

The bottom line is, I can do amazing things through Christ who strengthens me.


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Don't forget to water your garden

8/16/2013

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Then he said to me, “Speak to the winds and say: ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: Come, O breath, from the four winds! Breathe into these dead bodies so that they may live again.’”

Ezekiel 37:9 (NLT)


Last spring my ten year old daughter Haley planted a seed in an old clay pot. She gathered the dirt and carefully filled the pot. She planted a few cosmos seeds and sprinkled dirt on top. Proudly she watered the plant and set it up high on a small table on the deck by our pool.

To my surprise the plant grew over a foot high. A pink blossom blooms every week or so. Once in a while though, the hot sun depletes the plant of water and it goes limp and shrivels. I remind Haley to water her plant and miraculously it comes back to life.

Our spirituality is a lot like Haley’s plant. We find nourishment to grow either by meditating, reading God’s Word or by talking to Him. Sometimes God even feeds us through other's examples or encouragement.  We may even find nourishment just by taking in God’s beauty all around us. But once in a while the world gets the best of us through busyness, opposition and stress. We forget to be filled with nourishment by seeking the presence of God.

We need the breath of God to fill and nurture us to live a full and healthy life. What might you need from God today? Seek His presence and be filled with life.



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A Walk Down Memory Lane

7/9/2013

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Take delight in the Lord
and he will give you your heart’s desires.

Psalm 37:4 (NLT)


I’m a scrapper. I love to scrapbook and I have been doing it for about thirteen years now. I have twenty-eight books accounted for on my bookshelf and have made others for family members.

In the last few days I have gathered pictures from my Mom and Dad, to begin the “Boating Book.” Talk about memory lane! I’m approaching fifty next year, so this was many years ago.

I had the privilege of growing up in the summers on three of my Father’s boats. Mom and Dad made that possible by working hard, and commuting to Maryland from our home in Pennsylvania every weekend after their rotating shift work. We spent almost every weekend and every vacation on the boat from the time I was about six years old.

My Father charted out many trips across the Delaware Bay and even ventured into the Atlantic Ocean. We spent endless weekends tied up to other boats at Veazey’s Cove in Maryland. We made wonderful friendships. I even had my first romance at the marina in Maryland. I couldn’t have asked for a better childhood.

Working on this book has sparked memories by looking through many pictures dated from 1971 to 1990. I feel so blessed to have been able to live that life style for so many years. Who knew gas prices and a husband who gets seasick would lead me into a different lifestyle in the family my husband and I are raising today. We love spending time in our backyard and floating in our pool. We have had the privilege of taking our kids on many trips to the Jersey Shore. I hope and pray that our children will grow up with wonderful memories of their childhood too. We too are very blessed. God has fulfilled my deepest desires.

It reminds me that God has a different plan for each of us—a good plan. Following His course is so much easier than following our own plan. He has charted out a plan for us that is designed very unique for each person. Yes His plan may rock our boats at times and lead us into uncharted waters, but there is adventure waiting around each corner of our lives. If we let God be our light, he will lead us to still waters each time we head out to sea. May God be your anchor?



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June 26th, 2013

6/26/2013

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Making Memories

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I rejoice in your word like one who finds a great treasure.

Psalm 119:162 (NLT)

 

When I was about twelve years old, I stayed with my grandparents in upstate Pennsylvania at their farm for the summer. A special breeze came through my window each morning. Getting up at dawn to feed the calves was a daily delight. The sweet scent of molasses in the cow feed is an unforgettable memory. The kittens would scurry for the scraps from the night before. Picking wild berries up on the hill top was the closest taste to candy. White linens blew in the breeze. Popping hot tar bubbles in the road was especially fun even though grandma would scold me as she would have to remove the tar with gasoline before I could reenter the house.

One special memory was crossing the road to the mailbox to look for incoming mail from friends and family. I was just as excited to send one off. I looked forward to the walk each day. I never knew what I might find. Each letter was a new treasure to read.

Hunting for letters from God is a bit similar. I never know what response I’ll find while reading His Word. But every day holds new opportunity to find letters from God. Whether on a sweet summer day or in the mid of winter, God holds special messages waiting to be opened.

Not every day is a memorable treasure for most of us. But each day, God has something new in store for us. It is up to us to find the hidden treasure as we seek in His Word and His presence.


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